Wrexham. Wales. I wake up all cosy in my bunk, at some point I must have stopped being freezing and started being boiling in my hoody, tracksuit bottoms and socks ‘cause now I’m sleeping in a reasonable amount of clothing. I climb out and stagger to the toilet, head fuzzy with a bit of hangover and find a delightful notice stuck to the seat informing me that the toilet hasn’t been emptied and is full of wee. Lovely. Seems Steve our driver didn’t count on us drinking quite so much and therefore having to get rid of quite so much eh! Tut tut. I chuck my bon Jovi boots on, that Lyall put in the freezer last night when we were all drunk, throw on some layers and trek off to find a café that will let me use their pisser.
Me mum gives me a call, to see not just how I am, but how the guys are holding up. She met them and Mike when they came to pick me up on the last tour and being a typical mum is full of worry and concerns. Bless her. I’m not sure that when she was raising me she would have been happy to know that one day she would be talking to me over the phone while I’m wandering around Wales looking for somewhere to piss, you know the tone of voice I’m talking about! Still, I tell her last night went well and promise her that I will behave ( Don’t worry, I crossed fingers) and head back to the bus.
Matt, the front man of Evile and Joel are watching Back to the Future in the kitchen, so I sit with them and watch the man flick while at the same time being horrified by how many microwave burgers are being zapped by The Fading. The smell is rank and me and Joel have to step off the bus several times to get some fresh ciggie air.
Once the venue is opened, we unload the gear in yet more freezing weather. Warbringer sleep through, jet lag and hung over no doubt! I find the ladies toilets and set about baby wipe washing since there are no showers for us today. I feel worrying clean and refreshed after that but still look forward to Manchester where I can drop in on my big bro’ and have a bath!
The venue we are in tonight is weird, one of the staff is shit and I’m feeling a bit off about the whole thing. We chow down our food, which has been cooked by the café attached to the venue while watching The Simpsons and then all get about our tasks, sound checking, instrument maintenance and merch stall set up.
Setting up the stand tonight is way easier ‘cause I know all the stock and I packed the boxes the night before, it looks pretty rad and I start getting excited about the night ahead. Until that is, I find out some rather worrying news. Low ticket sales. Fuck. By the time Evile come on stage, there are fifty-one people. 51 fucking people. As you can imagine, I sold out of stock completely and we all went home. Sold out of all three bands stock. Did I fuck, jeez, the few people who had come were obviously so broke they couldn’t even shell out a quid for a fucking sticker.
So I’m just kicking back really, getting a bit tipsy, watching the show. The Fading Bassist has been playing bass for Warbringer too. Warbringer’s bassist is unable to make the first two weeks of the tour due to health reasons and so Elad has amazingly learnt all the songs and is playing both gigs every night! What a fucking legend. There have been drum kit issues too. Ben from Evile is letting the other two drummers use his gear and Nic from Warbringer is having trouble working on it. Other than this the gig is going well considering there is barely anyone there!
During Evile’s set I start missing Mike massively. Then I well up. Then I have to go to the toilet and I lock myself in a cubicle and fucking cry like a bitch. This would be the low after the high of last night. I was so intent on last night being amazing, first gig back and all. So intent on being all stiff upper lip for the guys, who rightfully do not need people around them who are finding it hard when you can only imagine what this is like for them.
Tonight was the bitch slap, wake up call, loudspeaker in your face…Mike’s not here. Evile are on tour. Everything reminds you of Mike, of Sweden and that day in Sweden, at least half a dozen times a day you catch yourself thinking where’s Mike? Forgetting that he isn’t on tour. I still expect him to be there, it’s fucking weird and upsetting. I get it out my system, and get back out there. Lyall is right, there’s only one thing for it, drink a lot.
We pack up and hit the bar in earnest. I am a serious drinker at the best of times but tonight I’m trying to forget that this tour is actually quite fucking sad and hard and that subsequently I have severe writers block and still cannot write anything.
Drinks and dancing later and it’s off to bed. Only joking, not gonna leave out the good stuff eh?! I was necking back the vodka from the rider with Dr.Pepper, there was Jager all over the shop, Lyall and Kevill were doing drinking competitions, Joel and Ben were chugging away, even Ol was out. The Fading and Warbringer boys were all out and the club quickly filled up around us.
Look see, as we all know, what happens on tour, stays on tour. And I realise I’m writing about what happens on tour but you better believe there are juicy bits left out.
Many, many people got lucky that night, some with more than one person, there may have been vomit, there was a stupid fucking amount of booze and eventually there was a ridiculously loud party in the back of the bus between bands before finally everyone resigned themselves to the fact that it was the morning and way past bunk time.
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